Witty and funny quotes about life by Oscar Wilde, Mark Twain, Benjamin Franklin and more

by Jakub Marian

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“I intend to live forever. So far, so good.”
— Steven Wright
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“Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.”
— Oscar Wilde
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“There is nothing so annoying as to have two people go right on talking when you’re interrupting.”
— Mark Twain
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“Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.”
― George Burns
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“Don’t talk unless you can improve the silence.”
― Jorge Luis Borges
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“In order for three people to keep a secret, two must be dead.”
— Benjamin Franklin
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“The secret of successful managing is to keep the five guys who hate you away from the four guys who haven’t made up their minds.”
— Charles Dillon “Casey” Stengel
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“Age is a question of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.”
— Leroy “Satchel” Paige
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“Having children makes you no more a parent than having a piano makes you a pianist.”
― Michael Levine
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“It is better to remain silent at the risk of being thought a fool, than to talk and remove all doubt of it.”
— Maurice Switzer

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